i was just going to put something on here. i so seriously feel like crying, i miss it so much. i can't even explain how it is...
i mean, imagine everything you love in one place. then imagine everything that EVERYONE loves in one place. imagine everyone you love doing everything they love in one place. then imagine everyone that EVERYONE loves doing what they love in one place. and being able to go and see all your people do what they love. and then happening upon new people doing what they love. imagine being able to do that all alone without EVER feeling lonely. because you know that a person with whom you can talk about all of this stuff is right around the corner. or one bar over. or standing right next to you.
friends become family at an event like this. people bond unexpectedly. everyone is so open to new people and things because they're in a zone where they know that nothing can be bad.
it's overwhelming and exhausting and some of the most fulfiling time i've ever had in my entire life. i know that sounds dramatic for something as seemingly simple as a music festival, but it's the truth.
I'm so sorry hon. It doesn't sound dramatic at all. I know what it means to you. I'm sorry you can't be there. Sending you big hugs and glad you're going to San Diego to get a little sunshine for your birthday.
i really shouldn't go on facebook this week. seeing the pictures and updates is going to drive me nuts. i just realized... what makes it worse is that jud is there and i'm going to see him in all those pictures knowing that i should be hugging his neck. GARHF&)*()E&U(T&U($!&()@!&!!!
I challenge you to stay off Facebook - but will it really keep you from thinking about it all? What can you do to pass the time instead? I think you should do a project or collage or something.
of course it won't keep me from thinking about it, i don't think anything could. but i don't think i can unthink it enough to do something constructive. :) it's just motivation for me. motivation to get there next year.
i was just going to put something on here. i so seriously feel like crying, i miss it so much. i can't even explain how it is...
ReplyDeletei mean, imagine everything you love in one place. then imagine everything that EVERYONE loves in one place.
imagine everyone you love doing everything they love in one place. then imagine everyone that EVERYONE loves doing what they love in one place.
and being able to go and see all your people do what they love. and then happening upon new people doing what they love.
imagine being able to do that all alone without EVER feeling lonely. because you know that a person with whom you can talk about all of this stuff is right around the corner. or one bar over. or standing right next to you.
friends become family at an event like this. people bond unexpectedly. everyone is so open to new people and things because they're in a zone where they know that nothing can be bad.
it's overwhelming and exhausting and some of the most fulfiling time i've ever had in my entire life. i know that sounds dramatic for something as seemingly simple as a music festival, but it's the truth.
i miss it all dearly.
PS - this has also completely solidified the 0.01% of me that might have been swayed to NOT move back to austin when i'm done with this school stuff.
ReplyDeletemy heart feels implosive.
I'm so sorry hon. It doesn't sound dramatic at all. I know what it means to you. I'm sorry you can't be there. Sending you big hugs and glad you're going to San Diego to get a little sunshine for your birthday.
ReplyDeletei really shouldn't go on facebook this week. seeing the pictures and updates is going to drive me nuts.
ReplyDeletei just realized... what makes it worse is that jud is there and i'm going to see him in all those pictures knowing that i should be hugging his neck.
GARHF&)*()E&U(T&U($!&()@!&!!!
I challenge you to stay off Facebook - but will it really keep you from thinking about it all? What can you do to pass the time instead? I think you should do a project or collage or something.
ReplyDeleteof course it won't keep me from thinking about it, i don't think anything could. but i don't think i can unthink it enough to do something constructive. :)
ReplyDeleteit's just motivation for me. motivation to get there next year.