I've gained 15 pounds, and it's weird, because I'm finding strange comfort in my softness and curves right now. I can look at myself and see this isn't the texture of the body I want, and I know I want to be healthy and in shape, but there is something nice about eating for 2 months straight and end up not fitting in your clothes, but really liking that you have boobs and softness. It's just strange. I don't know why I feel like I'm hugging myself. I wonder if this is another eating disorder symptom. Like those people that say that eating gives them comfort. It isn't exactly the eating that makes me feel better, but right now I feel hidden in my own skin. Anyway, I'm not sure why I'm writing this here, it was just something I wanted to share with you.
meanwhile, my boyfriend is SEXAY! I keep hoping he doesn't notice or care, but at least the girls are a bit bigger. He's whoa. 6 days a week for the last 6 weeks has done a boy well. In the past week he went from making some nice progress towards muscles to omg, where did THIS body come from?! I'm trying to not be too excited about it because I don't want him to think I wasn't turned on before, but oh. my. god. I am now.
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i like squishiness personally. and - i wasn't going to say anything - but your face looked a little fuller in meg's pics and i like it.
ReplyDeletei think we can always appreciate our bodies differently at different times. i know i've never looked like this even though i was close to this weight when i first met everyone back in the '02 - it was just in different spots. i like the spots where everything is now. :)
and - DUH! - he's a dude working out 6 days a week? of course he's going to get hot! :D silly! the only reason i GAINED during my marathon was because i was miserable! ha!